Unlikely Events in the Realm of High School
1. A letter from a parent for a late dismissal.
Please keep my daughter in school for an extra hour or two. Some recommended options:
a) expose her to the “essence versus existence” debate, which is at the heart of existentialism
b) let her work on some extra math.
c) encourage her to read a 19th century Russian novel from the library.
2. Complaints from parents because a test was too easy.
Dear Mr. E. Z. Marker
Please do not give out marks as if they were candy from a gumball machine. We would appreciate a balance of routine questions along with some challenging ones. Contrary to popular misconception, brain cells are continuously generated in the mammalian brain, but they die within a short period unless the brain is engaged in a challenging mental activity.
3. A school board decision to pay teachers separately for administrative tasks on a piecework basis.
In order to reduce use of paper and to help teachers spend more with time with students and with class preparation, the EMSB will pay teachers $5 for every attendance sheet, late slip and document they have to fill out in the line of duty.
4. A spontaneous student-decision to clean up the school.
Given that some of the grade 11’s had such a light exam schedule, some brought in solvents to wash graffiti off the inside of lockers. Others brought in dusters to get at those neglected corners, while others washed boards in the middle of the week.
5. An entire staff working beyond their five required hours on the majority of professional days in June and September.
Since June and September are relatively stress-free times for teachers, they all took advantage of the available time and lack of students in the building to prepare teaching materials for the upcoming school year.